We are all broken in some way. It’s how we handle our brokenness that separates us.
I want you to think about that for a moment. Before you read where this is coming from and what I’m about to say. Read that one more time. We are all broken. We are all broken in some way. It’s how we handle our brokenness that separates us.
We were driving home the other night and having a great conversation. During that conversation though, Em says she’s broken. She is awesome but broken. So this blog is an open letter to her. The message is so important that I wanted to share it with you. I just hope that the message resonates.
My Dear Emelie,
This week you told me how you feel broken. You continued on with how you are broken because of your challenges and autism. My gut instinct was to tell you how you aren’t broken, but then I realized we all are broken. We all feel there is something “wrong” with us. There is something all of us dread or wish we could change. We all have scars and wounds. Some of them are visible but often times the brokenness we have, we hide from the world. We all have things that will break us too along our journey through life.
That’s what makes you so special Emelie. You choose to embrace what you feel gives you that “broken” feeling and make it so much more. You don’t let it define who you are. You understand it’s a part of who you are but not your definition. There will be times in your life where you will feel even more broken. The hardest thing in life is to manage our broken times and brokenness without letting it rule over us and who we are.
Some of us embrace our brokenness. Some of us hide it. Some of us hide our brokenness better than others. We all have to learn to deal with it and cope with it no matter what we choose. Those who learn to embrace it and allow it become part of who we are without allowing it to take over have a strength that cannot be matched. Although, that doesn’t mean there won’t be times that you struggle to be who you need to be or want to be.
As you learn to mold yourself into someone you can be proud of being, you allow others into your journey. You still deal with the harder stuff on your terms but overall you carry a beacon of hope for others who feel broken, even if they are feeling broken for other reasons. While some of us deal with it in the middle of night alone when it’s dark and quiet and others it shows on the surface you have found a balance in how you deal with it.
I love to think of all of us as pottery that has been put back together. Not with a clear invisible superglue but rather veins of gold and silver. Very much like the Japanese practice and philosophy of Kintsugi. It shows off that broken history with a beauty that is unique to each piece of pottery. After all, no two things will ever break exactly the same way. Just like when you fix it, it will never fix perfectly.
You, my dear one, are a rare joy to watch. Reminding me daily that none of us are perfect and that is perfect in itself. Life would be boring if we all were exactly the same. This brokenness you speak of adds to your beauty, grace and personality. It doesn’t define it. The fact you embrace it just shows your ability to be strong in your weaknesses.
Brokenness really shouldn’t be about the flaws. It’s about the beauty and grace in which we carry our brokenness. In the process we heal. We are whole. We are perfectly imperfect.
I love you.
For more information on Kintsugi: http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/content/article/2009/03/02/AR2009030202723.html